Who am I to others?

For Heavens Sake by Mike Morgan

"Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves." Romans 12:10
"because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now" Philippians 1:5
"To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me." 2 Corinthians 12:7

The people that we come into contact on a regular basis, be they family or friends, are in a position to see our strengths and weaknesses. How do they view us? Are we considered as someone who can be relied upon or as someone who needs lots of patience to deal with? Are we seen as a brother/sister or partner or are we seen as a thorn in the flesh?

In our interaction with people whom we regard as 'on close terms', we might tend to neglect their feelings or thoughts. More often than not, because we are on such good speaking terms, we might even use harsh words or unkind words in the midst of our teasing or comments and in this way, unintentionally chafe or sadden their feelings. Our close friends and family are meant to be cherished and treated with added respect and honour because they are people who means a lot to us. It would be good to be mindful of their sensitivity and give them the needful encouragement when they are facing rainy seasons as well as commending praise during the sunny days.

In the church family, we are called brothers and sisters in Christ, and it is because of His sacrifice on the cross, that we become a family. This status is something to be treasured, because it does not come easily. The family of God is called to be devoted to one another in brotherly love, which means that we are to care for and to be concerned with one another's well-being. The term 'devoted' is used to show that effort, perhaps lots of it, is required. Being devoted means to be zealous or ardent in attachment, loyalty, or affection and this entails concentration and willingness to fork out time and effort to share one another's burdens. This can be considered an arduous task yet it brings with it great satisfaction and joy as you see the brother or sister being strengthened in God.
To honour one another above ourselves is another principle to practise as respect is one of the highest praise that one can offer to another. When we honour someone, we value and appreciate the person. Everyone has faults but when you value someone, you are recognising his/her good points or perhaps seeing the potential in him/her. Ever heard of the term 'self-image'? Sometimes, I wonder if that term 'self-image' should be coined as 'other-image', because we do not realise that most of the time, self-image is not really an image that we project onto ourselves but rather it can be an image that we project onto ourselves based on others' opinions of us. Parents, friends, relatives and even the media communicate certains ideas and notions that may create a negative impact on our well-being and image. It is important to be aware of these negative influences and also to make effort to honour and encourage instead of criticise and condemn the people around us.

The family of God is also called to be in partnership in the gospel. This requires cooperation and deference from everybody. Partners are people who know how to maximise one another's good points and make up for the shortcomings. In telling others about Christ's work, everybody has a part to play and we are to support one another in any way that we can, be it prayer, finances, time or encouragement. Every little bit counts and being partners means not belittling one another but to enhance and appreciate one another's abilities.

Yet, as people who have been hurt before or gone through certain difficulties, we may also react in ways that reflect the wounds that have been inflicted upon us. When this happens, be it ourselves or others being the source of discouragement or dissent, instead of seeing it as a disaster, we need to learn to see it as an opportunity to practise brotherly love and honour. These circumstances happen to keep us humble and to learn to empathise and understand one another's distress and concerns. Just as how gold needs to be refined to rid of its impurities so that its true brilliance can be seen, people need to undergo certain trials to be moulded and refined before their true radiance can be evident.