Being Real

Sometimes, i wonder...
What does it mean to be real?
Does it mean saying things that hurt others even though that's the honest opinion or saying things to please others even though that's not really the total truth...
Yet, if one says things that hurt others, then that kind of 'realness' upsets...but, if one says things that make others feel good, then what 'realness' do deceitful words have, since it's just a facade, the person will eventually still get hurt.
Maybe, it's just a matter of perspective. Changing a perspective would mean a change of views and feelings. For instance, when one feels annoyed at someone else's actions, the first instinct would be to snap at the person. That's being real but a 'realness' that would hurt the feelings of the party being snapped at. Yet if one was to see things from another perspective, then perhaps one won't feel annoyed. Then, one would not snap at the person. That's also being real, a 'realness' that opts for harmony.
Now the tricky part would be applying this to real life. In reality, being real takes practice. (Some may wonder, if being real takes practice, then isn't practised 'realness' fake because it's being trained out and not spontaneous enough? Not necessary. Humans are creatures of habits and training. When we do something long enough, it becomes in-built into our system and we will take it as being part of us, as something natural. It becomes an issue of adaptability. Humans are well-equipped to learn and unlearn habits and behaviour in order to improve themselves.)
For example, a mathematical formula's considered something that's real, a fact but it takes lots of practice to apply that formula in problem sums in order to perfect the use of that formula in problem-solving. Similarly, a trait such as patience is considered a good trait, yet it takes lots of practice for one to display the trait of patience to the extend that it becomes natural, it becomes real. One is being real when one is sincerely making the effort to be real.